Rambling...

Okay, so I called the supposed original source of the info about the hubby cheating on me, and he denies it. He said that "to his knowledge" it never happened. This is from someone who would never lie to me, especially to cover for the hubby. So, I now believe the hubby about this one. I do not know why my "chosen child" said what she did. I am going to go with the theory that she took something out of context, and not what others believe which is that she is angry with her father (Okay, he is not really her father, but he is the father she has known most of her life. Her real father she refers to as "the donor".) and is trying to cause more problems for him. I don't think she would ever be so cruel. Does that mean that I for a minute believe that the hubby has been completely faithful to me? NO! But I do believe that this one was just a misunderstanding. And I have apologized for waking him up shortly after bar close Saturday night/Sunday morning to call him names that would make a bus full of drunken Marines blush. I was misinformed, and I am willing to admit that I was wrong. THIS TIME. Now, that said, on to today. I didn't go to work tonight. I called in sick. I have been sick for weeks now. I am not getting any better. In fact, I am getting worse. Tonight I had a headache that would drop a fucking mule. My nose is sore from too much wiping and blowing. And my throat hurts from coughing so much. My chest aches with every breath, and breathing is becoming a chore. I think I will take The Honey's "advice" (suggestion, recommendation, order...lol) and take a breathing treatment or three. I am a bit concerned that this cold is settling itself so deep in my chest. I have this sinking feeling that the doctor will say the dreaded P word if I go see him. I can not afford to be that sick. One day of work here or there is fine to miss, but if it really is that nasty P word, that will mean a week or more off of work, and I just can't afford that. It feels a bit like trying to breathe through wet cotton that has been stuffed into my lungs. (You would think that feeling like that would help me to put down the cigarettes for awhile, huh? Ha! Not a fucking chance. How pathetic am I?) I took some Sudafed and some Nyquil...the coughing has abated, but I am not sure that is such a good thing, now the shit is just sitting there clogging me up... ugh, I can't win! To top it all off, I have been going insane all day worried about The Honey. He has been pretty sick himself lately, and had an appointment today with a specialist. I haven't heard from him since about six thirty this morning, and so I have no idea what is going on. I am going to be stressed until I hear from him. So, even though I took the Nyquil (which normally knocks me unconscious for at least six hours.) I am still unable to sleep. And sleep is what I need to get better. Ugh. When it rains it pours. I guess I can always sleep some other night. I am however going to go to my bed, curl up under the covers and read awhile while I try to get this fever to break. Sitting here in my cold ass kitchen is not helping I am sure. I am thinking I need to ask the hubby to move my computer to my bedroom. I am not sure where I will put it exactly as the spot it used to be housed in is now where my sugar gliders live. I think I have too many animals. My neighbor says if ever it starts to flood around here, he is coming to my house, because obviously I am the reincarnation of Noah. Wow, I am rambling again. My son Jamie has come back home to live again. That makes me both happy and sad. Happy because I have missed the sound of his voice. I have missed his humour. His love. I have missed seeing him interact with his baby sister. I have missed everything about him. (Yes, even the temper tantrums.) But sad, because he was finally away from this place, away from these evil children that live around here, away from a school that just doesn't give a shit. I think we have decided to send him cross district to a different school. I am giving him a few days break before we get him started in his new school. I will get him enrolled on Wednesday. He just needs a little time to readjust to being back with all of us. Okay, I have rambled long enough. I guess that's all, Goodnight.