A lazy Sunday afternoon...

Okay, so I have been very sad this week. I had to do something to feel a little bit better before I go back to work tomorrow. I think they are beginning to suspect that I am crazy. I have been caught crying (apparently with no reason) a few times this past few days. My boss actually asked me if I wanted to speak with Pastor Manny. Somehow, I don't think this is something I can discuss with clergy. So I went to Toni's today. Her home is my haven. My safe place. My scream, laugh or cry, it is all okay kind of place to be. I cried. Then I gave myself a facial. I didn't feel any better. So I gave myself a manicure and a pedicure. I still don't feel better, but I have softer skin and pretty hands and feet. The space bar on my computer keeps sticking. I hit it and it does nothing. So that is making me weepy too. How silly is that? Eventually I will be okay again. Eventually I will be able to smile a real smile, and not just fake it when people are looking a little too closely. But for now, I will just give a cheesy grin and fake my way through. For now I will be content that I am loved despite it all. Later I will go in and soak for a long time in a hot bath, and close my eyes, and try to take myself to a happy place. Later, I will crawl into bed and put my arms around my little girl and hope sleep claims me. And hope that I dream. And hope that in my dream, I get to be where I want to be. That's all,Goodnight.

And simply because i was bored while killing time at the keyboard waiting for The Honey to come online tonight i took a picture of my nails, aren't they pretty? I need to go get acrylics though, because they are all different lengths because they break at work. ( I actually took a picture of my toes too, but I have ugly feet and i will not post that!)