Warning, the links included in this post will cause permanent brain scarring...

Okay, so I just consumed a doughnut for lunch. The first such indulgence in weeks. I am already regretting it. Not only does it mean that I will probably regain two pounds, but it was nasty, and I now feel ill. It was stale, and even dipping it in my coffee (black please, trying to cut the calories a little.) did not help. I should have just tossed it after the first bite, but my brain was screaming for some sugar. Note to self... no more nasty doughnuts. Ugh. Anyway, I have realized that I have far too much time on my hands these days due to the fact that I hardly ever sleep anymore. I found myself actually clicking links, and googling for various information that was included in some post or another that I have read. We all know by now that my favorite website on the net is a blog belonging to Jon "the hellbound smoker" Adams. This man is fucking hilarious, but I should have known better than to actually go looking for shit he is talking about. For example, sitting here with nothing better to do, all my chat buddies having long since logged off, everyone in the house asleep and snoring, I was bored and decided to try to find a picture that Jon made reference to some time back in one of his posts. The picture is called Loopback. Do not click the link if you know what is good for you. It is a picture of a man committing auto sodomy. Auto-Sodomy is the act of self sodomy, in other words sticking your own penis in your own ass. I tried to tell you, too much time on my hands. Well, needless to say I found the picture. It is not a pretty sight, but well you know.. a girl gets curious sometimes. And of course, once I found the picture, I just had to click some of the other links on the page. I wish I did not have such a desire. I am now scarred for life. I actually clicked a link that led me to a video of "The Biggest Pussy Ever". What the hell was I thinking? Yes, it is a porno clip. If you absolutely must see it, click flash player at the top of the video box. But it is kind of like driving past a fatal car wreck. You do not really want to look, you just can't help yourself. I laughed my ass off I must admit. I almost literally fell out of my chair, with tears streaming down my face. I was strangely repulsed and and fascinated at the same time. That shit has got to be a prosthetic of some sort right? That can not possibly be real can it? If my sweet little coo coo looked like that I would figure out a way to kill myself and dispose of my own body in such a way that it would never be found. Can you imagine what the guys in the morgue would be saying? If I worked the morgue and something like that came in I swear I would be inviting all my friends to come see. And of course once I was at the freak show of a website, I had to click more links. That was when I decided I finally understood the old adage "curiosity killed the cat". I will have nightmares for months because of the things I saw. I will have nightmare villains consisting of giant pussies, and malformed penises chasing me until I launch myself from the highest rooftop. And you people wonder why I do not sleep. I need to have more dreams like the one I had last night. I will not share it, because it is intensely personal. Let's just say that I was talking to The Honey yesterday, and he said things to me that I will not repeat to you. I, of course, was surrounded by a crowd of people and unable to respond. I kinda like that, though it made concentrating on work a bit difficult for the first hour or so afterwards. (Okay, I liked it A LOT!) But it did make for some really interesting dreams. I actually slept for about seven hours, and woke up feeling wonderfully refreshed. Who knew that was what I needed to help me sleep? I wish I had, I would have had him do that for me long ago. Anyway, I need to get some clothes on (Yes, I am typing this still wrapped in a sheet.) and head out to get some cigarettes. That's all, Bye.